Don't Take it for Granted
1.The use of dialogue makes the scene come to life and creates a easy flowing and easy to understand paper.
2.The describing of their friend's life and what she had been through was a great personal touch that made feel sadness for the friend.
Mistaken Procrastinator
1.The final conversation with her teacher helped to make me the reader, understand the point of her paper without having her just tell me.
2.Their point was clear but more importantly, very concise, because it was a short but a effective way of making her point without rambling on unnecessary details.
Dreaming
1.The use of detail was a incredible way of setting up the scene, because it made me feel as though I was there and could see what they were seeing.
2. The conclusion was very powerful in which it tied together the paper and stated a much broader statement that was one to think about.
Relationships
1.The entire paper was a great play on my emotion because they set up the paper in which you felt the love she had and the pain she felt when it was ripped away.
My changes
1.I need to slow down my key scenes so the reader can process them and understand the message.
2.I need to add the reactions of the other mentioned people such as my dad.
3.I need another scene to show what it was like to go to school with the pressure i had in order to allow the readers to connect.
4.I need to cut the reflections parts that ramble and focus more on the pathos.
5. I need to add more detail where it is lacking while also keeping it concise
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Monday, August 1, 2011
Annotated Bibliography
Lohr, Steve. (2009, June 9). Smartphone rises fast from gadget to necessity. New York Times, Retrieved from http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/10/technology/10phone.html
This article is perfect for my argument because it states how much the sales have increased for phones despite the downfall economy. It has a perfect quote about how the cell phone has become an apenndage for a man, perfect for my argument that we are too dependent on smart phones. Also, the part about how it is a social norm to answer emails in an hour or less or your are considered ignoring the person which is just ridiculous and proves that people worship these phones too much.
Eric, Zeman. (2011). Smartphones tied to 25% of u.s. car crashes. InformationWeek, Retrieved from http://www.informationweek.com/news/mobility/smart_phones/231001237
This article is essential for my safety argument. It has statistics that show that smartphones are the cause of 15-25% of all car accidents. This proves my point that phones are a hazardous distraction and cause unesecarry risks.
Bilton, Nick. (2011, July 11). Smartphones and mobile internet use grow, report says. New York Times , Retrieved from http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/07/11/smartphones-and-mobile-internet-use-grow-report-says/?scp=6&sq=smartphones&st=Search
This article is perfect for my argument of making social messes out of people because it is full of statistics based on how much people use the smartphones. It states that 87% of smartphone owners check emails at least once a day and 25% use it more than computer. Seemingly harmless, yes, but the fact that people are checking emails and on it more than a computer, meaning they are connected on the technology level but in relity they are ignoring whats around them.
Proposal
1) I am evaluating __Smart Phones___ as a good/bad ___Bad_____ using criteria X, Y, Z in order to establish that (larger cultural claim)
X:Creates a social problem for users that who eventually cannot conduct an actual conversation and maintain an interpersonal relationship with people.
Y:The reliance of the phone for information creates people who feel they never have to learn it because its the Google mentality.
Z: They create a ridiculously society unsafe, in terms of mugging, people to fall and people to crash
X:Creates a social problem for users that who eventually cannot conduct an actual conversation and maintain an interpersonal relationship with people.
Y:The reliance of the phone for information creates people who feel they never have to learn it because its the Google mentality.
Z: They create a ridiculously society unsafe, in terms of mugging, people to fall and people to crash
Holiday's/Birthdays...etc
What does it mean to you? Why are you interested in it? What are people saying about it. How have people reacted to it. Where has it been taken up and used or repeated? Where has it made the most impact? How and why?
It means a great deal to me because i am faced with a different holiday every month. I am interested in it because i am so sick of what a media scam it has become. It used to be such holidays like chirstmas were a time to reflect on religion and cherish what we have, as well as valentines day in which we show our significant others how much they mean to us. But now a days the media has convinced us its all about the best and most expensive presents we can give others to sow we care. People love holidays because they love getting the goodies that come with them, overlooking what they are truly buying into. People react to the outrageous prices charged around holidays but none the less the have to keep up with the social norm or else they are the social pariah. It has taken up everyones time and money and is repeated every year. It makes the most impact at Christmas and in peoples wallets because instead of celebrating the holiday, its all about what can be done to make it the most expensive and luxours experience like the Easter bunny leaving dvds and new games like its Santa. It's not the holidays i dont like but rather the fact you have to literally buy into them and it becomes a big advertisement and less a celebration.
It means a great deal to me because i am faced with a different holiday every month. I am interested in it because i am so sick of what a media scam it has become. It used to be such holidays like chirstmas were a time to reflect on religion and cherish what we have, as well as valentines day in which we show our significant others how much they mean to us. But now a days the media has convinced us its all about the best and most expensive presents we can give others to sow we care. People love holidays because they love getting the goodies that come with them, overlooking what they are truly buying into. People react to the outrageous prices charged around holidays but none the less the have to keep up with the social norm or else they are the social pariah. It has taken up everyones time and money and is repeated every year. It makes the most impact at Christmas and in peoples wallets because instead of celebrating the holiday, its all about what can be done to make it the most expensive and luxours experience like the Easter bunny leaving dvds and new games like its Santa. It's not the holidays i dont like but rather the fact you have to literally buy into them and it becomes a big advertisement and less a celebration.
"Going Green"
What does it mean to you? Why are you interested in it? What are people saying about it. How have people reacted to it. Where has it been taken up and used or repeated? Where has it made the most impact? How and why?
"Going green" means a lot to me because i'm soooo tired of hearing about. I am so sick of everyone saying do your part and buy this and use this because every little thing counts! wrong, the only thing that counts is if we reduce and not just use better things. People are saying and endorsing ridiculous things like solar panels that the only people can afford are the rich people who make "green" mansions, thus again ruining the whole point. People have reacted positively about it and take steps like recycling more, or using things with less plastic or simple things like that. It has been taken up all throughout the country as you find recycling everywhere and bottles made with less plastic. It has made the most impact in the way people think about what they are wasting and what they can reuse, because with the damage being shown everywhere like tv and such people are starting to pay attention and take action. The only problem is its the wrong action.
"Going green" means a lot to me because i'm soooo tired of hearing about. I am so sick of everyone saying do your part and buy this and use this because every little thing counts! wrong, the only thing that counts is if we reduce and not just use better things. People are saying and endorsing ridiculous things like solar panels that the only people can afford are the rich people who make "green" mansions, thus again ruining the whole point. People have reacted positively about it and take steps like recycling more, or using things with less plastic or simple things like that. It has been taken up all throughout the country as you find recycling everywhere and bottles made with less plastic. It has made the most impact in the way people think about what they are wasting and what they can reuse, because with the damage being shown everywhere like tv and such people are starting to pay attention and take action. The only problem is its the wrong action.
Smart Phones
What does it mean to you? Why are you interested in it? What are people saying about it. How have people reacted to it. Where has it been taken up and used or repeated? Where has it made the most impact? How and why?
My first cultural interest is iphones or smart phones in general. It means alot to me seeing as how I am surrounded by them literally everywhere i go. They control my friends and even parents attention and cause them to always be preoccupied. People rave about them because they can do everything from the palm of their hand. Everyone has to have one or else they feel they are left behind in the race fro the best technology. I am in interested in it because it angers me when I look over when im with my friends and they are on facebook or searching videos completely ignoring everything around them. It has made the most impact on the society in the sense that everyone is now more connected than ever, but also ignorant to whats going on around them, because they focus more on the technology and less on the life that is right in front of them.
My first cultural interest is iphones or smart phones in general. It means alot to me seeing as how I am surrounded by them literally everywhere i go. They control my friends and even parents attention and cause them to always be preoccupied. People rave about them because they can do everything from the palm of their hand. Everyone has to have one or else they feel they are left behind in the race fro the best technology. I am in interested in it because it angers me when I look over when im with my friends and they are on facebook or searching videos completely ignoring everything around them. It has made the most impact on the society in the sense that everyone is now more connected than ever, but also ignorant to whats going on around them, because they focus more on the technology and less on the life that is right in front of them.
Lady Gaga
What sort of arguments do they make about Lady Gaga? What evidence do they use? Note a few rhetorical tactics that are used that are particularly effective in this kind of cultural commentary.
In the main article written by Camille Paglia, there were many arguments made against Lady Gaga. These arguments included how her supposed idols and influences were in fact nothing like her and what she does is just steal traits from stars such as Madonna in order to make her point. They say that Lady Gaga trys to be this rebelous avant gard artist, but in actuality she is just bankrolled by the big corporations and is just popular because of technology. But these arguments all add up to say what the author truly means, and that is that Lady Gaga represents the death of the sexual revolution. She makes her point by creating a strong ethos through examples of past "sex" idols such as Madonna, Elton John, David Bowie, etc. and then relating it back to her and how plastic and disgusting she looks. As well as even going all the way back to the early 1920's to define what sex is. The author uses statements Lady Gaga has made to make her seem contradictory and has used examples of her past life to show how much her new persona has taken over in order to seduce the technology savvy generation. All of which help create a strong ethos. Her statistics about how much Facebook followers Gaga has and how many views and records she has sold helped create a stronger logos. But the way Camille uses what Gaga describes as her creativity or vagina, throughout the article appeals to the pathos cause its like a gross factor that gets the audience wondering what that's all about.
In the main article written by Camille Paglia, there were many arguments made against Lady Gaga. These arguments included how her supposed idols and influences were in fact nothing like her and what she does is just steal traits from stars such as Madonna in order to make her point. They say that Lady Gaga trys to be this rebelous avant gard artist, but in actuality she is just bankrolled by the big corporations and is just popular because of technology. But these arguments all add up to say what the author truly means, and that is that Lady Gaga represents the death of the sexual revolution. She makes her point by creating a strong ethos through examples of past "sex" idols such as Madonna, Elton John, David Bowie, etc. and then relating it back to her and how plastic and disgusting she looks. As well as even going all the way back to the early 1920's to define what sex is. The author uses statements Lady Gaga has made to make her seem contradictory and has used examples of her past life to show how much her new persona has taken over in order to seduce the technology savvy generation. All of which help create a strong ethos. Her statistics about how much Facebook followers Gaga has and how many views and records she has sold helped create a stronger logos. But the way Camille uses what Gaga describes as her creativity or vagina, throughout the article appeals to the pathos cause its like a gross factor that gets the audience wondering what that's all about.
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